This has been a crazy week, so I guess I’m writing random things until next week begins and we’re back in our routine. I thought today I’d write about my loves…my true joys and my reasons.
I have two daughters that hold such a joyous light, huge hearts, shy natures, and strong souls. Their strong will is a challenge most days. Their hearts help open mine. Their joy reminds me that I need to take the time to soak it in, along with the memories that follows.
GROWING UP I always said I wanted to be a stay at home mom and wife–my mother would warn me that this would be the hardest thing I’d ever do (eye roll), boy was she RIGHT! It’s hard mommas, it’s hard having the patience, it’s hard giving when nothing seems left or you feel like they’ve got it all, it’s hard talking what feels like 24/7 and it’s hard not ever taking a break….with stay at home moms, there are no days off. EVER.
Your husband may give you an outing, you may have a breather for a moment, and even in that time you are worried, if they’re okay with whoever they’re left with…constant right?! But even at the end of the day, even when I want to shut their door and cry a little because we made it through a tough one, I’m forever thankful for my beautiful girls. Even when I don’t feel like I can keep it up…they’re my reason to keep trying.
I try to REMEMBER that we’re their role model, we’re their idol, we’re their reason to smile and we’re their reason to love. We are THEIR reason until they think they find another. They will more than likely be the mother I am to them. I have a friend that said one day, “I don’t think the world is the way it is because those children were loved too much, they weren’t loved enough”. Now in some cases we may not know the truth…but what an awesome point. It got me thinking, who cares if they sleep in our bed with us, who cares if they make the mess even though I don’t want to clean it up, who cares about the small stuff….With everything we can choose our battles. I’m working on this, because…who cares. It won’t last forever, time is flying and it just continues to race itself, leaving chubby hands, giggles, messy faces, “uh oh’s” and hugs behind. Treasure it.
I tend to be so hard on myself as a mom and I doubt that will ever go away, it’s the most important thing to me and well, it’s my job. Moms that are friends, come together and enjoy the parenthood of it all, let yourself vent about the frustrations, and let yourself cry about the “should haves” or “had I known”.
More than anything….just love them and lets remember this too shall pass. My daughters are my reason and will always continue to be. My heart, My world, My all. Love to mine and yours.